Thinking Things Through

Fancy lunch at SHAPE

It was 8 a.m. when Angeli got the call. Jimmy, one of the groupmates, called to see if she was on her way to the Gare Centraal station for their trip to Maastricht, Netherlands. Of course she had! The whole day before, she had kept in her mind that she needed to be at the station at 8 and in that thought, she set her alarm for 8. It was too late. She'd miss another optional trip. Way to impress her professor. She was sure that by now, she had acquired the image of the least dependable student.

For almost a full 2 hours, she felt the guilt. She indulged in guilt-shopping and guilt-eating to try and get over it but her attempts were like shooting a bullet at Captain America's shield. To get her thoughts together- her thoughts regarding all that had occurred that week, she went on a hunt for a bookstore or a coffee shop. She ended up at McDonald's in Port de Namur. To her surprise, they had wifi, and several people were just sitting solo reading a paper or browsing the internet. Perfect! She fit right in.

The group at NATO Headquarters

She had visited the NATO headquarters to be briefed by an international representative, a representative from the U.S. Mission to NATO, and a German representative. Briefing after briefing, Angeli heard the same answers in different tones. Afghanistan and Syrian atrocities were the main focus. She was lucky enough that day to ask the NATO officials a few questions, although she already knew the answer having read the points from the Chicago Summit. It wasn't enough. None of the answers were satisfying and yet they were, in their own way, justified. How could the world just stand by and not see what was happening in Syria? How many pictures and recordings of horrendous sights have to be released in media for the world to act? But then, inevitably, she knew that with action would come consequences. Aid being sent wouldn't just appear as a gift. It would be sacrifices by her own people. By other nations, risking their lives and giving up something of theirs for those in dire need. For a while she questioned if she even had the right to get mad? If she could not personally do anything about it, then why should she expect the same from someone else?

None-the-less, she temporarily got over it. While sitting in McDonald's, she pulled out her latest copy of The Economist and began reading. The headlines were all about Europe. About whether it would survive the Greek blow. Angeli didn't know what her position was and she wasn't sure who's side to choose, or whether to choose a side or not. But she each moment she spent in another country, she began to realize that she had been living in an American bubble for all of her life.

Formal picture at SHAPE with Polish officer

The visit to SHAPE, NATO's military headquarters, once again humbled her. She was briefed by a Polish officer, a Swedish officer, and finally an American officer. It was all staged, yet very informational. She knew that even those officers probably did not know the full details of what they were presenting (for security reasons of course). She wanted to ask many questions but it was no good. She knew what the answers would be. Maybe she just wanted the reassurance that someone else was thinking the same thing as her. They discussed Afghanistan for a while and how it was now ready to stand on its feet again. It came as a relief for all countries... even America. Yet, something was not setting right with Angeli. While everyone was happy that troops would return home, it seemed to her that the Afghan civilians thought otherwise. Of course, she had no way of knowing, yet, she felt strongly of it. She constantly found herself at this contradiction and did not know what to do about it, and so she pushed it to the back of her mind and hoped to unscramble her thoughts one day when she had solid answers and positions to back.

Waterloo- where Napoleon was defeated.
The lion is made of melted cannons and faces France

She missed quality time with the rest of the group, but spending time with the family opened up new avenues of thought. She saw how European history was such a big part of their lives, how every skirmish that occurred in Europe was taken personally, and how much she had been taking for granted. This day was quite a non-eventful day since Angeli's time in Brussels, but it was one of the most thought provoking she had yet encountered. Someone once said, "For your born writer, nothing is so healing as the realization that he has come upon the right word." Angeli was patiently waiting for such a realization. Maybe this trip will be more than rewarding!

xoxo